Yesterday morning I had to break the news to mom that she would not be living with us anymore.I had my mini "breakdown" when I went to get her from the caregiver yesterday morning on our way to the facility. I explained that the "Dr." had called and had determined that "we" needed more help than we had to take good care of her. She was mad at the idea of him "making" us do this and she was definitely less than pleased with me for going along with it.
We had visited a week earlier to have a quick evaluation and fill out some paperwork, she thought she was just there to talk to the nurse. As we pulled into the facility she had no recollection of us ever being there.
My Husband,brother and daughter helped move furniture and hang pictures. She sat and was grumpy even when the nurses tried to humor her with lunch, ice cream and an art project.
I feel so blessed that we were able to find a woman to be mom's friend for the last 2 years... it allowed her to stay with us so much longer that she would have...
I feel remorse that I can no longer handle her needs yet relief that she is able to go to a place right near the house and has gotten very good recommendations. The Regional nurse just happened to be there that day and she said we had made a "Very good choice"... So hopefully this will be the case.
It was surreal last night not having to be "on watch" or have bedtime duty let alone not having to getup at 5:40am to take her to the bathroom. I can see that it is going to take some time to not feel like I need to be doing something. Today I went through all her clothes and "Goodwilled" 3 bags full...
I am headed back up there today to take a few more items and see how she is doing.... I am honestly a bit apprehensive about my visit... I hope it doesn't stir her up.
I am sure that this will be one of the few times I will blog for the next several months unless something truly interesting occurs... until then thanks for listening!
This blog is to help share my adventures, yes adventures with my Mom's dementia and to help keep me as sane as possible... not saying much!! We shall see how this goes and where it winds up. Kinda like walking in a blizzard wearin' white...
Friday, October 18, 2013
Friday, March 8, 2013
#32 Water water everywhere....
Well it has been quite a while since I have had time to sit down and write.. another reason I have been negligent is due to the fact that not too much has been funny lately. Mom has been a bit of a pill on most days...
My oldest daughter has moved back in with us (back in November) which I am happy about. I appreciate having another person to help me with mom, especially on the nights I work late and on Saturdays. While this is a blessing to me... it has wreaked havoc with mom. My daughter must remind mom of someone she HATES.. she will have nothing to do with her and is hateful to the point of saying very mean things like " I don't love you and you don't love me" even after being told it is her granddaughter, there is no convincing her that she is here to help.
My daughter has been here for about 4 months and mom is just now beginning to warm up to her... Mom has had a bad attitude alot lately, she is paranoid that we are talking about her... she often thinks about leaving even though she has nowhere to go....She grabbed her sweater and her vest the other day and said she was leaving... when we said "OK" she turned around and came back in the house and said " I can do what I want"... LOL.. so much for leaving............I have been told this is normal and just another fabulous part of this crappy disease.
Moms condition has become increasingly more demanding. She now requires care most of the time.. I can only leave her for about 30 min or so without supervision. She wears diapers because of the lack of muscle control, not full on need of them just preventative. She seldom uses a fork or spoon and now uses a sippy cup to prevent spills. She can't dress herself or use the restroom without assistance, which brings me to the most current situation we have had.
I was teaching Thursday and get a text from the caregiver telling me to call her we had a water problem. I call her and evidently the toilet had overflowed for about an hour or more and there is water everywhere... I left school as soon as I could and find that water has spilled and soaked about 4 to 5 ft past the bathroom into her bedroom and soaked the carpet comppletely. I rented a carpet cleaner and spent 4 hours sucking water out of the carpet.
What you ask might have caused such a mess??? 90% of the time mom doesn't wipe herself after using the restroom, but of course this time she decided that she would... the problem is that she flushed the washcloth down the stool causing the backup. I plunged and cleared the toilet it appears that we may no longer leave washcloths near the toilet.
Hoping for a peaceful spring break...... I could sure use it! Laughter is therapeutic so is red wine!! Time for some "Funniest Home Videos" and a nice glass of "red" Bye for now!
My oldest daughter has moved back in with us (back in November) which I am happy about. I appreciate having another person to help me with mom, especially on the nights I work late and on Saturdays. While this is a blessing to me... it has wreaked havoc with mom. My daughter must remind mom of someone she HATES.. she will have nothing to do with her and is hateful to the point of saying very mean things like " I don't love you and you don't love me" even after being told it is her granddaughter, there is no convincing her that she is here to help.
My daughter has been here for about 4 months and mom is just now beginning to warm up to her... Mom has had a bad attitude alot lately, she is paranoid that we are talking about her... she often thinks about leaving even though she has nowhere to go....She grabbed her sweater and her vest the other day and said she was leaving... when we said "OK" she turned around and came back in the house and said " I can do what I want"... LOL.. so much for leaving............I have been told this is normal and just another fabulous part of this crappy disease.
Moms condition has become increasingly more demanding. She now requires care most of the time.. I can only leave her for about 30 min or so without supervision. She wears diapers because of the lack of muscle control, not full on need of them just preventative. She seldom uses a fork or spoon and now uses a sippy cup to prevent spills. She can't dress herself or use the restroom without assistance, which brings me to the most current situation we have had.
I was teaching Thursday and get a text from the caregiver telling me to call her we had a water problem. I call her and evidently the toilet had overflowed for about an hour or more and there is water everywhere... I left school as soon as I could and find that water has spilled and soaked about 4 to 5 ft past the bathroom into her bedroom and soaked the carpet comppletely. I rented a carpet cleaner and spent 4 hours sucking water out of the carpet.
What you ask might have caused such a mess??? 90% of the time mom doesn't wipe herself after using the restroom, but of course this time she decided that she would... the problem is that she flushed the washcloth down the stool causing the backup. I plunged and cleared the toilet it appears that we may no longer leave washcloths near the toilet.
Hoping for a peaceful spring break...... I could sure use it! Laughter is therapeutic so is red wine!! Time for some "Funniest Home Videos" and a nice glass of "red" Bye for now!
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